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Fundamental #4: Celebrating Your Victories
Today is about celebrating the successes you have on the way to getting what
you really want with women. It's critically important, and if you can't do this,
you'll have a hard time making women desire you.
You can motivate yourself by beating yourself up, or by celebrating the victories
that you do experience. It turns out that, if you want to get women, you have
to become good at encouraging yourself to keep going, rather than berating yourself,
or forcing your way through painful activities. Women aren't attracted to men
who motivate through pain. If you berate yourself into interacting with women,
you will seem stressed to her, and un-accepting. She will respond by avoiding
you.
Beating yourself up does not work. We wish it did, but it doesn't.
Why Celebrate
Most men only celebrate when they get sex. They do not see incremental victories
along the way to becoming a guy who can get sex with women. You must learn to
see and celebrate the incremental victories along the way, or you are toast.
If you want to keep yourself motivated, you must learn to make every interaction
with a woman into a success.
How to do it
- Praise yourself and feel good about your successes with women, no
matter how small.
- Remember, if you've had one success, you can have another.
- Smile when you praise yourself.
- Praise yourself immediately after the success.
- Re-experience your successes later on.
Making every interaction with women a success:
Example #1:
- The interaction I had. I said "hi" to a woman in line. She
said "hi" back, then I didn't know what to say, so we didn't say anything
else.
- How I interpret it as a success. I actually took a step and
interacted with a woman! I normally never would have done that. I can
see how I'm on my way to bigger and better things with women!
- The good feelings I let myself feel about the success. I let
myself feel good. I let myself feel some good feelings of anticipating
the success I am creating with women. I even let myself feel good that
it was easy!
Example #2:
- The interaction I had. I said "hi" to a woman, and she smiled
and was really friendly, and we had a little conversation!
- How I interpret it as a success. That's great! That's what
makes success with women happen! That conversation wouldn't have happened
if I hadn't had the balls to take action!
- The good feelings I let myself feel about the success. I felt
good, and told myself "Yea, you made that happen!"
Example #3:
- The interaction I had. I said "hi" to a woman who was wearing
stereo headphones while rollerblading the other way on the bike path.
- How I interpret it as a success. I'm actually taking action!
And I'm not afraid of looking like a fool, or of what she might think,
either! It seemed like a little thing, but it really did take something
for me to do that!
- The good feelings I let myself feel about the success. I said,
"I'm the man!" to myself. I smiled about having taken action,
and it felt good.
Example #4:
- The interaction I had. I said "hi" to a woman when I was leaving
the gym, and she seemed really startled and grunted "hi" back.
- How I interpret it as a success. Hey, I'm taking action and
putting myself out there in interactions with women! This is what being
a powerful guy is about!
- The good feelings I let myself feel about the success. I let
myself feel good about not being upset by her response. I felt great
that I was able to do that!
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